A story of resilience, persistence, and why never giving up can make all the difference.
When people think about separation or divorce, they often assume that once the relationship ends, the hardest part is over.
Unfortunately, for many parents, particularly those who have experienced domestic abuse, the challenges continue long after they leave.
This is the story of one of my clients, shared with their permission, whose determination led to a life-changing outcome after more than a year of uncertainty
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A Year Without Child Maintenance
For over twelve months, my client received no child maintenance.
Like many single parents, she carried the full financial responsibility of raising her teenage child alone, stretching every penny simply to cover the essentials.
Despite fully engaging with the Child Maintenance Service (CMS) and providing information about her former partner's financial circumstances and lifestyle, she was twice issued with a zero-rate assessment, meaning no child maintenance was payable.
From her perspective, this did not reflect reality.
She believed there were significant inconsistencies between the assessment and her ex-partner's actual financial position, but found the process difficult to navigate and was unsure whether all of her evidence had been properly considered.
The Hidden Impact of Domestic Abuse
My client did not leave her marriage lightly.
She made the difficult decision to end the relationship because she no longer felt safe.
The relationship involved multiple forms of domestic abuse, including:
Coercive and controlling behaviour
Financial abuse
Ongoing emotional manipulation
Like many survivors, she had stepped away from her own career to become a stay-at-home parent.
This wasn't entirely a free choice. It was part of the controlling dynamics within the relationship.
After separation, she faced the enormous task of rebuilding her independence—retraining, returning to work, processing trauma, navigating co-parenting, and trying to secure the financial support her child was entitled to.
Preparing for Court
As an Accredited Breakup & Divorce Coach and Domestic Abuse Champion, my role isn't to provide legal representation or attend court.
Instead, I support clients emotionally and practically throughout the process.
When my client was preparing for an online court hearing, one of her biggest worries was seeing her ex-partner again.
Together we worked on techniques to help her:
Manage anxiety
Stay calm under pressure
Feel emotionally grounded
Present herself confidently
Focus on facts rather than fear
Court proceedings can be overwhelming, especially where there has been abuse. Having the right emotional support alongside legal processes can make a significant difference.
Persistence Changed Everything
Although the second CMS decision again resulted in zero child maintenance, my client believed something wasn't right.
Rather than accepting the decision, she continued asking questions and pursued a review through the unearned income and assets route within the Child Maintenance Service process.She also found that following up concerns by telephone and putting them in writing often resulted in more meaningful engagement than relying solely on online communication.
Her determination paid off.
Following further investigation, the court unanimously ruled in her favour.
The outcome was remarkable:
£25,000 in backdated child maintenance arrears
Ongoing child maintenance reassessed to approximately £1,500 per month (including arrears)
A formal payment plan issued by the Child Maintenance Service
While payments had not yet begun at the time of writing, this represented a significant breakthrough after a long and emotionally exhausting process.
More Than Just Money
This outcome isn't simply about finances.
It's about accountability.
It's about ensuring children receive the support they deserve.
It's about recognising that sometimes decisions can and should be challenged through the appropriate channels.
Every case is different, and there is never a guarantee that another person will achieve the same outcome.
However, this case demonstrates the value of persistence, asking questions, seeking clarification, and exploring every available option when something doesn't appear right.n some families, there is another layer.
Why This Matters to Me
As both an Accredited Breakup & Divorce Master Practitioner and a single mum myself, seeing my client achieve this outcome was incredibly rewarding.
I am also proud to be both a Domestic Abuse Champion and White Ribbon Champion, reflecting my commitment to raising awareness of domestic abuse, challenging harmful behaviours, and supporting those rebuilding their lives after controlling relationships.
My mission is simple:
To ensure people feel heard, supported, empowered, and able to move forward with confidence.
No one should have to face these challenges alone.
If You're Going Through Something Similar
f you're dealing with a separation, divorce, child maintenance issues, or recovering from an abusive relationship, please remember:
You don't have to have all the answers today.
You don't have to go through it alone.
The right emotional support can help you approach difficult situations with clarity, confidence, and resilience.
If this story resonates with you, I'd love to help you explore your own next steps.
Why don't you take a look at the rest of my blogs they may give you some practical guidance, support, and advice to help you through your journey.
How I Can Support You
As a breakup and divorce coach, I recognise the signs of these dynamics and help you understand what’s healthy, what’s not, and how to respond effectively. This comes not only from lived experience, but also from my intensive training as an accredited breakup and divorce coach.
I support clients with:
Co-parenting challenges
Setting and holding boundaries
Managing high-conflict dynamics
Rebuilding confidence after separation
I can also help signpost your young adult to the right support where needed.
To book your free discovery call regarding your breakup or divorce, visit:
www.beyondthebreakcoaching.co.ukWhile coaching doesn’t replace legal advice, it equips you with the mindset and structure to approach mediation, discussions with your ex, and solicitor meetings with clarity and confidence.
Life After Divorce
As you start to feel clearer, coaching helps you build a future that feels right for you. It’s your time to reconnect with who you are and create a life that feels safe, real, and happy.
How Do Sessions Work?
I offer a free 30 minute Discovery Call. Thereafter, your first session would be 90 minutes and gives you immediate relief which is charged at one hour helps to give you: emotional clarity, and practical direction. Sessions after that can be booked individually or as part of a block package, which is more cost-effective.
I can provide full terms and conditions for these arrangements upon request, so you know exactly what to expect.
The first session is designed to help you feel grounded, supported, and clear about your next steps. If you choose to continue with coaching, the guidance and structure from that initial session will seamlessly carry over into your ongoing plan.ext to edit it.
How To Book
If you’re ready to see how coaching could support you, a free 30-minute discovery call offers the chance to discuss your situation and look at your next steps.
Coaching empowers you to take control of your emotions, decisions, and future—turning a turbulent chapter into an opportunity for growth, clarity, and renewed confidence.
To book your free 30-minute discovery call, click here: www.beyondthebreakcoaching.co.uk
Please note that all sessions are conducted online, allowing you to receive support from the comfort of your own home.
Facing the end of a relationship can feel isolating, but with the right support, it’s possible to approach this transition strategically and move toward a positive resolution.
Schedule your free discovery call today and begin your journey toward stability and confidence.
We're here to help at Beyond The Break Coaching
With the right support, that next chapter can be stable, confident and purposeful.
If you would like guidance, you can book a free 30-minute discovery call here: Book a Discovery Call Today.
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